I wonder what I should write about. There is so much noise in the world right now. And it gets hard to distinguish right from wrong. Nobody has the time to find out what is fact, including me. I let my belief systems and morals guide me to the news that I want to see. It becomes hard to see the opposite side’s view when you can no longer relate to them on a moral level.
They may have their own judgements and ideas about how the world works. But it does get hard these days to understand them when all they believe in goes right against what you have learned how the world should be.
People are complicated. The world is not. It doesn’t give a shit whether you are right or left, whether you are black, brown, or white, whether you are a northi/chinki/madrasi/mallu/bong/marwadi, whether you are christian/hindu/musilim/jew/buddhist/jain. The world exists not for anybody. It just exists, due to some factors that we know and some others, we cannot yet comprehend. I know this much.
Everything else is fiction.
And I guess that’s all that matters.
Chill out. Relax. Life will still be waiting for you after this. Say fuck all to everything in your life for the next five minutes. And see how wonderful that feels.
Of course you and I know that this feeling cannot last long. We will have to go back. But, we can enjoy the sweetness it provides for the next five minutes. Sometimes those five minutes is more than enough of a break, you know. Sometimes it’s not.
You can dive headlong into any problem or work that you have after the next 5 minutes. For the time being, put your phone out of your reach, unplug your headphones, keep the book away, close your eyes and lie down. Unwind.
This is not a post on how to meditate.
There are tens of thousands of people who are more qualified than me to do that. A quick Google search will be enough.
What I can tell you though is what you feel during the meditation and afterward. These opinions are subjective, obviously.
I sit down on my chair, put on my earphones and listen to the soothing voice of my teacher.
I focus on the breath, especially where I can feel it in my body – the nose, upper lip, chest or abdomen.
These initial moments are a mixed bag of sorts. All these random thoughts go by. My to-do list for the day, a scene from a movie or a TV show that I had seen or something someone had said. I realize that I am immersed in this train of thought only when your teacher says so. She advises me to observe the thoughts.
“The moment you feel that you are lost, bring your attention back to your breath.”
I bring my attention to the breath, to the stream of air in my nose. This is the point when I start to realize that I can erase my mind like a blackboard. “Inner me” starts to jump up in joy, only to realize that I am excited. I drift into this state of observation. I hear everything. From the distant sound of a crow to the creaking of my ceiling fan. Sounds the brain filters out in normal hours.
I observe the rhythm in my breath. I observe the thoughts that arise in mind. I observe the uneasiness in my body. I observe the momentary itches in my body. I let them pass. Not reacting, only observing. During this time, the voice of the teacher is only heard in the back of my head, like a distant echo.
Before you know it, the bell has rung and it has been 15 minutes. My teacher advises me to bring myself back to the present. I wiggle my toes or notice the weight of my butt on the chair. I open my eyes, and I am calm. Not relaxed. Calm.
The crows are flying overhead. Eris must have found me. I wish I could stand up to face her – as a last defiance of sorts, but I can hardly move my toes. Oh well, everyone falls, one day or the other. Today must be my day.
Those bastards in the west must have carried out a strong sacrifice – a missile strike, or a forest fire. They will have their way for the time being, and I won’t be there to curse them.
The ice beneath my body pulls me down. I have started to dissolve into it.
I wonder how long these ice sheets will last without me. If the people in the east join hands with the west, this planet and its people won’t last long.
I will be back. The human spirit never ceases to amaze me. I will live in the minds of the people who wish to see the prosperity of this planet. I will live among the leaders who strive to make ever so small amends towards the collective good.
No matter how many sacrifices they make, no matter how powerful She gets, I shall always survive. I just hope that this planet still exists when I am reborn in my physical form.
viaDaily Prompt: Trill